This time I'm returning home...yeah!
When I was leaving the airport, the guy in front of me at security saw the tears in my eyes and said, "Goodbyes are hard, but welcomes home's are so sweet."
I have a feeling that he is going to be correct; I can't wait for my welcome home!
Flight leaves in 3.5 hours and counting!
Saturday, August 1, 2009
Tuesday, July 28, 2009
But instead...
Today, we were supposed to explore Oklahoma City with Cindy
BUT INSTEAD
We attend a memorial service to celebrate her life
We want to cry
BUT INSTEAD
We rejoice!
We wish to understand
BUT INSTEAD
We walk by faith!
As many of you know, Cindy Meredith--assistant director at DaySpring Villa, summer missionary supervisor, volunteer coordinator, dear friend, energetic evangelist, and mother to two--passed on Wednesday morning. It was a great loss to not only DaySpring Villa, but to each guest, staff member, and volunteer.
I apologize that I did not write sooner but it just seems that words are insufficient to explain the rollercoaster of emotions that come with death. There is the sting of the loss and the heartache for the family, there is the laughter over memories, and the guilt over laughing. It seems that each emotion feels strange and you wonder, as one of the ladies asked me last night, "is this normal?" What is a normal response to death, I am afraid that there is not one.
We are still uncertain what caused Cindy's passing, but as the pastor put it yesterday, there is one thing that we are certain of...Cindy never truely died!
We are certain of this because this is the promise that Jesus Himself gave us:
"I am the resurrection and the life. He who believes in me will live, even though he dies; and whoever lives and believes in me will never die. Do you believe this?"
John 11:25-26
The memorial service for Cindy was yesterday and it seems that some of the weight has been lifted from the hearts of the staff as we continue the weekly routine with a little more pep in our step, free, after a time of grievance, to remember Cindy with a smile on our face, even if there is a bruise still on our hearts.
During this time, as He has all summer long, God has graced us with laughter. We went to see Oklahoma on Wednesday evening, following the insistance of the motherly Ms. Wilma. I laughed until my cheeks were sore and then laughed some more!
Thank you for your continued prayers and support. I look forward to a bitter sweet good-bye on Saturday and a super-sweet hello when I see my family and friends again!
BUT INSTEAD
We attend a memorial service to celebrate her life
We want to cry
BUT INSTEAD
We rejoice!
We wish to understand
BUT INSTEAD
We walk by faith!
As many of you know, Cindy Meredith--assistant director at DaySpring Villa, summer missionary supervisor, volunteer coordinator, dear friend, energetic evangelist, and mother to two--passed on Wednesday morning. It was a great loss to not only DaySpring Villa, but to each guest, staff member, and volunteer.
I apologize that I did not write sooner but it just seems that words are insufficient to explain the rollercoaster of emotions that come with death. There is the sting of the loss and the heartache for the family, there is the laughter over memories, and the guilt over laughing. It seems that each emotion feels strange and you wonder, as one of the ladies asked me last night, "is this normal?" What is a normal response to death, I am afraid that there is not one.
We are still uncertain what caused Cindy's passing, but as the pastor put it yesterday, there is one thing that we are certain of...Cindy never truely died!
We are certain of this because this is the promise that Jesus Himself gave us:
"I am the resurrection and the life. He who believes in me will live, even though he dies; and whoever lives and believes in me will never die. Do you believe this?"
John 11:25-26
The memorial service for Cindy was yesterday and it seems that some of the weight has been lifted from the hearts of the staff as we continue the weekly routine with a little more pep in our step, free, after a time of grievance, to remember Cindy with a smile on our face, even if there is a bruise still on our hearts.
During this time, as He has all summer long, God has graced us with laughter. We went to see Oklahoma on Wednesday evening, following the insistance of the motherly Ms. Wilma. I laughed until my cheeks were sore and then laughed some more!
Thank you for your continued prayers and support. I look forward to a bitter sweet good-bye on Saturday and a super-sweet hello when I see my family and friends again!
Saturday, July 18, 2009
It's ladies night and the feelings right...
Okay, so we didn't dance to the music or anything like that, but we did enjoy a night out, just us girls!
The other summer missionaries and I along with LaCasey and Micki, who are both missionaries here at DaySpring Villa, had a girls' night on Thursday, complete with dinner at one of my FAVORITE restaurants, PF Changs, and a viewing of the Broadway Musical WICKED!
It was my first off-Broadway production and I so enjoyed it!
Throughout the night I found that all of our minds constantly drifted back to the shelter, the ladies there, and all of the situations "still pending." I realized that ministry really never leaves you, even if you leave it. I am beginning to empathize with Paul as he both mourned and rejoiced with the churches, whether he was near or far.
Wednesday, July 15, 2009
Late nights!
On Tuesday I worked my longest shift yet and saw the work of Christ all around me, although at times I was too tired to recognize it!
I worked alone from 4-11p. Usually when I work the night shift someone else is working 1-9p, so I'm only by myself from 9-11p, which is a fairly calm time, but on Tuesday everyone else got off at 4p.
I had two intakes coming in, which requires a good bit of time and paperwork and such as well as being away from the phones for approximately 30 minutes. I also was scheduled to cook dinner by 5:30p, go to staff meeting, do med call and answer the door. God provided amazing volunteers to cook a yummy dinner, the director stayed and answered the phone until after I finished the intakes and refused to leave until I had sat to rest and have a bite to eat. One of the house staff members had emails to check and personal work to do on the computer, so she stayed until almost 10 pm, providing some companionship and someone to answer the door in my absence.
During the shift I was so frustrated and overwhelmed. I did not finish my work until after midnight, but as I laid in the bed that night, God kept me awake to give me time to process the day, but also to show me all the things that He had done for me during the shift, things that I had been too absorbed to see!
As I lay half-asleep that night, I heard a lot thump. I turned and saw my roommate, staring at her bed. She looked like she was sleep walking. "Are you okay?" I asked groggily. "I just want to go to SLEEP," she replied. I stood up to see what was going on and realized that her mattress had feel through the frame in the bed so that half of it was on the floor. I lifted it back through so that she could lay back down, but I couldn't help but laugh, and I couldn't seem to stop laughing, even after we laid back down to go to sleep. The pressures of the day began to fade as the laughter rose from my belly to my mouth. I had to contain it since Danielle was sleeping, but it did bring a smile to my face and a slight snort to my nose. Thank you God for laughter!
This morning I was reading about David in 2 Samuel 16-17 and how God provided him with assistance in the midst of his struggle with Absalom. David must have at times been tempted to say, "Where are you God?" but if he would have looked up from his troubles, he would have seen all that God had provided, just as I saw!
I worked alone from 4-11p. Usually when I work the night shift someone else is working 1-9p, so I'm only by myself from 9-11p, which is a fairly calm time, but on Tuesday everyone else got off at 4p.
I had two intakes coming in, which requires a good bit of time and paperwork and such as well as being away from the phones for approximately 30 minutes. I also was scheduled to cook dinner by 5:30p, go to staff meeting, do med call and answer the door. God provided amazing volunteers to cook a yummy dinner, the director stayed and answered the phone until after I finished the intakes and refused to leave until I had sat to rest and have a bite to eat. One of the house staff members had emails to check and personal work to do on the computer, so she stayed until almost 10 pm, providing some companionship and someone to answer the door in my absence.
During the shift I was so frustrated and overwhelmed. I did not finish my work until after midnight, but as I laid in the bed that night, God kept me awake to give me time to process the day, but also to show me all the things that He had done for me during the shift, things that I had been too absorbed to see!
As I lay half-asleep that night, I heard a lot thump. I turned and saw my roommate, staring at her bed. She looked like she was sleep walking. "Are you okay?" I asked groggily. "I just want to go to SLEEP," she replied. I stood up to see what was going on and realized that her mattress had feel through the frame in the bed so that half of it was on the floor. I lifted it back through so that she could lay back down, but I couldn't help but laugh, and I couldn't seem to stop laughing, even after we laid back down to go to sleep. The pressures of the day began to fade as the laughter rose from my belly to my mouth. I had to contain it since Danielle was sleeping, but it did bring a smile to my face and a slight snort to my nose. Thank you God for laughter!
This morning I was reading about David in 2 Samuel 16-17 and how God provided him with assistance in the midst of his struggle with Absalom. David must have at times been tempted to say, "Where are you God?" but if he would have looked up from his troubles, he would have seen all that God had provided, just as I saw!
Monday, July 6, 2009
Just me and my cereal bowl....
I love mornings like this, when I can sit with a yummy bowl of HoneyNut Cheerios and consider all the happenings of the past week that I have yet to share. However, the yumminess of my cereal is making it increasingly difficult to type with both hands.
It has been a pretty great week. The half-way mark of the summer has officially come and gone. I was quite excited to know that I was half-way to my plane ride home, half-way to moving into the new apartment, half-way to seeing my handsome boyfriend, and half-way to be HOME with my amazing fam. As the half-way point has now passed, I still feel excited about all those things, but also sad to know that the days of sharing a room with my new friend are quickly passing, the days of staff lounge laughter and ministry to broken but oh so funny and enjoyable women.
Yesterday I taught Sunday School to the women and it was quite a joy! I had been pondering what to teach if I had Bible study one weeknight. I had a lesson plan, sort of, for something about the attributes of God and then had been studying one of David Platt's messages from the LifeBlood series. Last week, the Sunday School teacher asked me to teach and the lesson from the quarterly was on God the Father. It was so amazing how that fit with the attributes of God lesson that I had already prepared. The lesson was 3 parts (of course, I'm baptist, right?).
1) How can we know God?
2) What is God like?
3) What does God desire from us?
I have been struck lately by the variety of false beliefs about God that permeate our world, our church, and even my own thinking.
For instance, many people seem to believe that God changed between the OT and the NT. One lady commented that God was mean in the OT. He is the SAME God. If God changed, then He must have gotten better or worse. If He got better, then at one point He was not complete and therefore not God. If He got worse then He could be better and would not be God. SO God did not change! (Make sense?) This is just one of the false beliefs that I myself have pondered. Noticed any others?
The lesson included many scripture passages in which we discovered and discussed characteristics of God. One of these verses was Romans 6:25-26
Now to Him who is able to establish you according to my gospel and the preaching of Jesus Christ, according to the revelation of the mystery which has been kept secret for long ages past, but now is manifested, and by the Scriptures of the prophets, according to the commandment of the eternal God, has been made known to all the nations, leading to obedience of faith.
Christ is the one who is able to establish us. He can ground us in His word and we will not be moved! On our own we are bound to backslide, but with Him we can stay firmly grounded...just one of the characteristics of God that we learned yesterday.
God reveals Himself to us THROUGHOUT the Word...check it out!
Saturday, the 4th, was quite an exciting day around here. We had spent the week cleaning coolers, packing, slicing tomatoes and tearing lettuce...busy, busy, busy. We woke up Saturday morning to RAIN! ahhh! We had planned to load up all the stuff at 9:30a and get it to the park b/f the streets closed at 11a. We continued with that plan, despite the rain and spent the morning praying that the rain would cease. At 2p (one hour b/f we planned to take the ladies to the picnic) the rain let up and the clouds parted to reveal beautiful blue skies! Nine ladies and approximately 13 children went to the picnic at the park. They had sprinklers and inflatables for the kids. Volleyball and frisbees for the young at heart and food for everyone! After dinner we packed up and moved our things to the street to watch the fireworks...beautiful! Another storm was coming in so we called it a night as soon as the fireworks were done and headed back to the shelter. After unpacking I was EXHAUSTED and happy to take a Sunday afternoon nap!
Here are just a few pics of the 4th festivities.
LaCasey (NAMB Missionary) and I waiting patiently for the fireworks
It has been a pretty great week. The half-way mark of the summer has officially come and gone. I was quite excited to know that I was half-way to my plane ride home, half-way to moving into the new apartment, half-way to seeing my handsome boyfriend, and half-way to be HOME with my amazing fam. As the half-way point has now passed, I still feel excited about all those things, but also sad to know that the days of sharing a room with my new friend are quickly passing, the days of staff lounge laughter and ministry to broken but oh so funny and enjoyable women.
Yesterday I taught Sunday School to the women and it was quite a joy! I had been pondering what to teach if I had Bible study one weeknight. I had a lesson plan, sort of, for something about the attributes of God and then had been studying one of David Platt's messages from the LifeBlood series. Last week, the Sunday School teacher asked me to teach and the lesson from the quarterly was on God the Father. It was so amazing how that fit with the attributes of God lesson that I had already prepared. The lesson was 3 parts (of course, I'm baptist, right?).
1) How can we know God?
2) What is God like?
3) What does God desire from us?
I have been struck lately by the variety of false beliefs about God that permeate our world, our church, and even my own thinking.
For instance, many people seem to believe that God changed between the OT and the NT. One lady commented that God was mean in the OT. He is the SAME God. If God changed, then He must have gotten better or worse. If He got better, then at one point He was not complete and therefore not God. If He got worse then He could be better and would not be God. SO God did not change! (Make sense?) This is just one of the false beliefs that I myself have pondered. Noticed any others?
The lesson included many scripture passages in which we discovered and discussed characteristics of God. One of these verses was Romans 6:25-26
Now to Him who is able to establish you according to my gospel and the preaching of Jesus Christ, according to the revelation of the mystery which has been kept secret for long ages past, but now is manifested, and by the Scriptures of the prophets, according to the commandment of the eternal God, has been made known to all the nations, leading to obedience of faith.
Christ is the one who is able to establish us. He can ground us in His word and we will not be moved! On our own we are bound to backslide, but with Him we can stay firmly grounded...just one of the characteristics of God that we learned yesterday.
God reveals Himself to us THROUGHOUT the Word...check it out!
Saturday, the 4th, was quite an exciting day around here. We had spent the week cleaning coolers, packing, slicing tomatoes and tearing lettuce...busy, busy, busy. We woke up Saturday morning to RAIN! ahhh! We had planned to load up all the stuff at 9:30a and get it to the park b/f the streets closed at 11a. We continued with that plan, despite the rain and spent the morning praying that the rain would cease. At 2p (one hour b/f we planned to take the ladies to the picnic) the rain let up and the clouds parted to reveal beautiful blue skies! Nine ladies and approximately 13 children went to the picnic at the park. They had sprinklers and inflatables for the kids. Volleyball and frisbees for the young at heart and food for everyone! After dinner we packed up and moved our things to the street to watch the fireworks...beautiful! Another storm was coming in so we called it a night as soon as the fireworks were done and headed back to the shelter. After unpacking I was EXHAUSTED and happy to take a Sunday afternoon nap!
Here are just a few pics of the 4th festivities.
LaCasey (NAMB Missionary) and I waiting patiently for the fireworks
Saturday, June 27, 2009
Surprise!
This week, as I was going on-shift and praying with the morning shift, Emily prayed that God would fill my afternoon with little surprises. I found the request a little peculiar, but was excited to see just how He would answer this prayer. I wanted to share just a few ways that God has answered that prayer this week--with little surprises!
--MAIL! I do love mail and this week Mom sent me a sweet note.
--Unexpected compliments: One of the guests told me this morning that I was beautiful and she could see Jesus in me (It was fairly early in the morning, no shower, etc. so you KNOW that was Jesus and not me!)
--The words of a child: I was doing childcare the other night, something that is not always my favorite. I was sitting on the floor when a little girl came up to give me a hug. Being silly as I am, I began rocking her like a baby and singing "Rock-a-bye baby." I thought that she would just laugh, but she sat up and said "Sing it again." I repeated the song at least four times, becoming a little wary and not knowing all the words. At last she hugged me tighter and said "I love you!" Now, those are words that you don't hear too often around here and they filled my heart. A surprise I love you is the best kind of surprise!
--The boldness to pray: This week Christ has given me the opportunity to do the paperwork for two intakes. This is the paperwork that must be done as soon as the women arrive at the shelter. It is much less involved than the expanded intake which must be done within 24 hours. ANYWAYS! As we are alone in the intake room, asking all these questions and reviewing all these rules, God has led me to pray with and for two women. Through this He has taught me the impact of a simple prayer and reminded me that He will give me the Words.
--Humor: In the midst of difficult situations, it is often hard to laugh, but God has gifted the staff at DaySpring with the ability to find humor in many situations and to laugh heartily in the midst of trial.
There were many other surprises as well, including a raccoon in the dumpster, but I will not bore you with all the stories.
Have a wonderful Sunday and continue to pray for the summer missionaries, the staff, and especailly the guests! Thanks a trillion.
--MAIL! I do love mail and this week Mom sent me a sweet note.
--Unexpected compliments: One of the guests told me this morning that I was beautiful and she could see Jesus in me (It was fairly early in the morning, no shower, etc. so you KNOW that was Jesus and not me!)
--The words of a child: I was doing childcare the other night, something that is not always my favorite. I was sitting on the floor when a little girl came up to give me a hug. Being silly as I am, I began rocking her like a baby and singing "Rock-a-bye baby." I thought that she would just laugh, but she sat up and said "Sing it again." I repeated the song at least four times, becoming a little wary and not knowing all the words. At last she hugged me tighter and said "I love you!" Now, those are words that you don't hear too often around here and they filled my heart. A surprise I love you is the best kind of surprise!
--The boldness to pray: This week Christ has given me the opportunity to do the paperwork for two intakes. This is the paperwork that must be done as soon as the women arrive at the shelter. It is much less involved than the expanded intake which must be done within 24 hours. ANYWAYS! As we are alone in the intake room, asking all these questions and reviewing all these rules, God has led me to pray with and for two women. Through this He has taught me the impact of a simple prayer and reminded me that He will give me the Words.
--Humor: In the midst of difficult situations, it is often hard to laugh, but God has gifted the staff at DaySpring with the ability to find humor in many situations and to laugh heartily in the midst of trial.
There were many other surprises as well, including a raccoon in the dumpster, but I will not bore you with all the stories.
Have a wonderful Sunday and continue to pray for the summer missionaries, the staff, and especailly the guests! Thanks a trillion.
Saturday, June 20, 2009
Growing-up is hard to do...
This week I have had to be a grown-up or at least pretend to be one, and at times that task is quite difficult. Yesterday I worked the 3-11 pm shift by myself for the first time. I had been working it all week long (except for Tuesday) but yesterday was the first time that no one else was on the schedule at that time. I must say that I was a bit frightened.
The beginning of the shift was fairly easy. Danielle was with me until 9. We cooked dinner (which went over fairly well), cleaned up after dinner, did some charting, Danielle did an intake interview, answered the phone, etc. Overall nothing too strenuous. Most of the ladies left DaySpring to go to Celebrate Recovery, so it was a pretty slow night at the shelter. They returned after children's bed time, so it turned out to be a fight to get everyone in the bed at a decent time. It is so funny to have 55-year old women come and ask you if they can go to bed later since it is Friday night. They reminded me of myself at home, finding every excuse and reason to stay up just 30 minutes later. In the end, the ladies got to stay up until 11 pm, but even then they were pushing the limit.
That is the most difficult part of this job, I do believe, learning to say no in a loving way, learning not to budge even when women who are older and sometimes much more confident (and cunning) than you are telling you that right is left and left is right.
By the time I got off last night, I was quite exhausted, mentally and feeling a little worn down spiritually as well. This morning as I was rereading 2 Corinthians 4, I stopped at the first verse: "Therefore, since we have this ministry as we received mercy, we do not lose heart." The portion that stopped me was the "we do not lose heart." I can't allow one semi-difficult night on the job to get me down. Luke 18:1 tells us to "pray and not lose heart." The Bible tells us that the Christian life will be difficult, but in due time we will reap if we do not grow weary (Gal 6:9).
These were great words of encouragement to me! Through His word and prayer, God is prepping me for another 3-11 shift this afternoon (although I will not be alone this time!).
I am so grateful for the privilege of being challenged beyond myself, so that I MUST turn to Christ..."for when I am weak, then I am strong" (2 Cor 12:10).
In all my growing up this week, I did have a chance to act like a kid again on Wednesday, and it was SO much fun! A family from a local church offered to take us to BigSplash (local water park) for Waves of Worship. It was a really cool deal. The park was open from 7-10 pm for only $5 dollars admission. Christian music was playing the entire time and there were more modestly clad people that I have seen at the water park in a while! The Millers have 6 children, five of which came along for the water park trip. The first slide we decided to brave is one that I will respectfully call--"The Wedgie Maker." Because that is just what it did (hehe). Luckily, we all prepared by wearing shorts! There were other fun slides as well, a rock-climbing wall on which 6-year old climbed higher than me, a wave pool, and diving platform. BigSplash turned out to be a Big Splash indeed!
Pre-water slide
Post-water slide
Thank you all so very much for your prayers this week. Continue to pray for the women at DaySpring Villa and for the other summer missionaries and I. We saw two women leave this week to live with friends, pray that they made and will continue to make wise choices. We also have three new women, one of which has four children with her and three other children who are older and not here. I believe that she has been overwhelmed by the kindness shown to her and the safety provided here at DaySpring. Pray that the kindness will point her only to Christ and His glory.
Please pray for opportunities to speak of the glory of God and to share what God is doing in my life with the women here.
Muchas gracias!
The beginning of the shift was fairly easy. Danielle was with me until 9. We cooked dinner (which went over fairly well), cleaned up after dinner, did some charting, Danielle did an intake interview, answered the phone, etc. Overall nothing too strenuous. Most of the ladies left DaySpring to go to Celebrate Recovery, so it was a pretty slow night at the shelter. They returned after children's bed time, so it turned out to be a fight to get everyone in the bed at a decent time. It is so funny to have 55-year old women come and ask you if they can go to bed later since it is Friday night. They reminded me of myself at home, finding every excuse and reason to stay up just 30 minutes later. In the end, the ladies got to stay up until 11 pm, but even then they were pushing the limit.
That is the most difficult part of this job, I do believe, learning to say no in a loving way, learning not to budge even when women who are older and sometimes much more confident (and cunning) than you are telling you that right is left and left is right.
By the time I got off last night, I was quite exhausted, mentally and feeling a little worn down spiritually as well. This morning as I was rereading 2 Corinthians 4, I stopped at the first verse: "Therefore, since we have this ministry as we received mercy, we do not lose heart." The portion that stopped me was the "we do not lose heart." I can't allow one semi-difficult night on the job to get me down. Luke 18:1 tells us to "pray and not lose heart." The Bible tells us that the Christian life will be difficult, but in due time we will reap if we do not grow weary (Gal 6:9).
These were great words of encouragement to me! Through His word and prayer, God is prepping me for another 3-11 shift this afternoon (although I will not be alone this time!).
I am so grateful for the privilege of being challenged beyond myself, so that I MUST turn to Christ..."for when I am weak, then I am strong" (2 Cor 12:10).
In all my growing up this week, I did have a chance to act like a kid again on Wednesday, and it was SO much fun! A family from a local church offered to take us to BigSplash (local water park) for Waves of Worship. It was a really cool deal. The park was open from 7-10 pm for only $5 dollars admission. Christian music was playing the entire time and there were more modestly clad people that I have seen at the water park in a while! The Millers have 6 children, five of which came along for the water park trip. The first slide we decided to brave is one that I will respectfully call--"The Wedgie Maker." Because that is just what it did (hehe). Luckily, we all prepared by wearing shorts! There were other fun slides as well, a rock-climbing wall on which 6-year old climbed higher than me, a wave pool, and diving platform. BigSplash turned out to be a Big Splash indeed!
Pre-water slide
Post-water slideThank you all so very much for your prayers this week. Continue to pray for the women at DaySpring Villa and for the other summer missionaries and I. We saw two women leave this week to live with friends, pray that they made and will continue to make wise choices. We also have three new women, one of which has four children with her and three other children who are older and not here. I believe that she has been overwhelmed by the kindness shown to her and the safety provided here at DaySpring. Pray that the kindness will point her only to Christ and His glory.
Please pray for opportunities to speak of the glory of God and to share what God is doing in my life with the women here.
Muchas gracias!
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